


Conviction

by joouheika



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: M/M, Manga Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-08
Updated: 2013-07-08
Packaged: 2017-12-18 03:12:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/874982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joouheika/pseuds/joouheika
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren is given some very simple and specific orders.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Conviction

Conviction.

There are many many many people in the world that even with it are unable to come to realisation of their ambition. Are unable to move into action. What it is they truly want to do.

Be it they lack power.

Be it they lack purpose.

Be it they simply cannot.

No matter how hard they try, no matter how hard they work, because all people are made up of different backgrounds, histories and circumstances- in the end all that they share on this earth is the same fate as “living” and “dying”- how unable to be the why-

Levi like Hanji has observed, so long as Eren has “conviction”- those other most often necessary protocols that needed to be fulfilled… be it power, purpose, or simple action- is of no matter. What has been set out to be done has been done. Easy as breathing. No longer obstacles.

Eren does not lack purpose or power, but surprisingly he lacks conviction many times. Direly. Annoyingly.

From whatever previous experiences that has shaped him has gave way to hesitance and thus cages in desire.

Yes, if Eren were to gain conviction, thoroughly and without shame- then that power of his would be more than valuable… it’d be invaluable. It would not be stopped.

(The monster he’d seen before.)

68 times Hanji records that Eren able to transform, back and forth, from noon to dusk. 

68 times, 34 of which are full transformation, 8 of which are skeletal and 26 are merely partial (where a limb is transformed, or a likeliness starts to form). Each time is met with the same energy, the same desperation. 

68 times Eren manages to transform because after their morning fast is broken, Levi has Eren stand before him and he orders it so- “It’s an order Eren. I don’t care how you come about it, I don’t care how many times you manage to do it- _you will transform into a titan until you drop_ , do you understand?” 

There’d it been. That hesitance, slight and disturbed, doubtful- what if he couldn’t?

But Hanji’s explanation must have clicked in somewhere: that with purpose he could transform and Levi’s orders gives him purpose. Levi’s glare gives him motivation. For when Eren met that glare his “yes sir!” was as vigorous as ever. Levi’s presence gives Eren conviction.

And so 68 times…

Hanji is in ecstasy. The data she obtained, the conclusions she’ll make and the theories she’ll come up with this new knowledge of Eren’s limitations- a titan’s limitations- well, there is nothing more exciting is there?

The rest of Levi’s squad has a very different opinion and when it is finally time to turn in, it is with great relief they do so.

Hanji is practically dancing when Levi collects Eren off the ground from the ridiculously pain in the ass to build over and over cage they’d made from some of the very uncut lumber for the winter, half of which is broken to smithereens with this experiment. Levi muses, if Eren is able to control his power more efficiently and keep his consciousness in check each time then Eren could take responsibility for this mess and this blunder on fuel supply. Using his titan form to quickly and in bulk gather wood.It’d make it so they wouldn’t be too fucked come winter.

Of course, once he’s able to move Levi will have him and the rest of the squad gather more wood and clean up this fucking mess that is disgracing their already not very graceful HQ come morning (that’s the plan for tomorrow).

So he thinks as he hefts Eren over his shoulder and makes his way to the dungeon where Eren usually sleeps. When Hanji’s chattering seems to only get louder as his steps progress what was seemingly away from her- Levi notices she is following him. He tells her to fuck off. She waves some of her messy, cramped, diagonally and not so diagonally written notes in front of his face, before taking another fifteen minutes to conclude her explanation before asking if he would allow her to have a look over the state of Eren’s hands before Levi _really_ tells her to _fuck off_ , the growl more than evident. She does, but not before a promise of giving him more details of her _holy shit I never noticed that before did you you know what this might mean_ in the morning that he really really really does not give a fuck about, most of all right now. All this accompanied with a chirpy little wave and a wink that is tremendously magnified under those damn goggles of hers. Levi hopes the next time Eren transforms he’ll at the very least break those mentioned soon to be proved otherwise indestructible goggles of hers.

They were what needed to be experimented on.

After the 68th transformation, (Eren had managed an arm) while Eren had been pulling his own arm from the titan limb, he’d cleaned fallen back and over, smacking his head against the earth. The sound wasn’t so loud that it sounded like he’d broken his skull, and if he did it’d healed stupidly fast. Whatever the circumstance he’d been unconscious after that.

Maybe it is from exhaustion that he’s passed out?

Levi throws Eren on the bed, with a touch more force than he’d intended. But if this brat hadn’t really transformed to the point of exhaustion but rather to the point of what he thought _should be exhaustion_ then-

That motion, though it was firm pillows Eren had his head smacked against this time- is enough to make him stir from his almost what was thought to be coma state of unconscious.

Levi is about to voice his reservations when Eren opens his eyes and looking back into Levi’s eyes-

Ah.

It is still there, that conviction Eren had obtained before his first transformation that afternoon, it is still present beating within his breast- the words he’d heard echo from his ears and through his eyes- the order Levi had given him. It is there consuming whatever purpose, whatever ambition that had tided Eren over before that moment before he’d been ordered- this order- it overrides all- it is as Levi had mused before- _with conviction Eren can_ -

“Enough,” Levi says as he covers Eren’s eyes, the younger boy’s mouth twisting in confusion as Levi leans close to him as he joins Eren upon the bed.

Levi removes his hand from Eren’s eyes only after he tells him- “You did your duty well today.”

He really wishes he hadn’t, the look Eren gives him next (flustered, the borderline of gratitude and disbelief) is all the convincing Levi needs to take this next course of action, a course of action that’s been suppressed since morning, since the day before, the night before and many nights before. Painfully he became aware of it as time passed and too much of his time passed with Eren by his side.

It’s as soft as he remembers, Eren’s dark hair, as he fists it in one hand and pulls Eren none too gently closer, closer, closer until their mouths are against the other’s and Levi gets to feel how soft Eren’s lips and tongue actually are, the other hand all the while on Eren’s shoulder before it comfortably settles against the side of Eren’s neck.

Bewildered, Eren pushes against him after some time. His hands already healed Levi notes- voice husky and lower than Levi has ever heard it- “W-what was that for?!”

Levi presses his thumb against Eren’s throat, his already tight grip on Eren’s hair drawing tighter.

“What was that for _sir_?”

The line of Levi’s mouth is angry, as it always is, but the harshness it usually carries is toned down as if he absorbed some of the softness of the lips he’d been gnawing at only moments before? He scoffs and feels Eren tense up.

“I thought because you did so well today a reward was in order.”

Eren sputters. Levi distinctly feels Eren’s long fingers grip and ungrip at his shoulders, as if unsure if they can be there or not.

Levi sighs, heavy and annoyed, especially at what Eren has to say next.

“I-I-I don’t- I’m not sure what-”

“Eren.”

“Y-yes sir!”

“Do you want to fuck or not?”

Levi can hear it, even if he hadn’t been at this distance he would have heard it, the rapid beating of Eren’s heart, the thick gulp of not only his saliva but his doubt as well.

_It is seriously pissing him off._

“Will you hurry the fuck up and make up your goddamn mind?” 

_Fucking brat._

That is exactly what he wanted to be doing right now, fucking this brat but if Eren- fuck him, seriously, every single way for how dark his blush has gotten. Levi could feel its heat at this distance and it was intolerable- fuck fuck fuck fuck- fuck breathing-

“It’s just…”

Eren is looking away from him and if looking at him in the eye wasn’t bearable this was even more unbearable.

“I… we’ve been out all day… I’ve been sweating a lot and I must have fallen in the dirt many times… and……..”

He doesn’t continue. Levi can feel his anger rising like bile at the back of his throat.

“Spit it out.”

“I’m dirty. “

One second.

“…sir.”

Too late.

“Do you seriously think this is the time to be fucking around-”

This was not the reaction Eren was expecting, this is quite the opposite.

“-when we could be actually fucking, if we fuck we’re going to be dirty anyway- we’ll wash afterwards, now if that is the only thing barring you from-”

“H-huh but Mikasa said _before_ is typically when-”

“Eren.”

“-besides I don’t know if I can stay awake for much longer I’m really-”

“Eren.”

“-I’m not sure what I’d even-”

Eren’s cry is sharp and carries as Levi yanks his head back.

“ _Why the hell are you still speaking when I’m speaking_ you goddamn brat.”

The tears are visible at the edges of Eren’s eyes as Levi continues, whatever patience he’d cultivated is depleted in this moment, as he unclasps buttons and rearranges their clothes and holds Eren up, nestling beneath him, switching their positions so Eren is now settled atop of him. Eren’s whole body jerks back as he feels the tip of Levi’s cock enter him. He looks everywhere but at Levi as if there is an exit in this dungeon that will manifest as an exit to this situation.

There is no such exit.

He comes here by Levi’s side and he leaves here by Levi’s side or not at all.

“Corporal-”

“You’ve talked enough Eren, what I want to know is if you will obey _this order_ \- Eren we are going to fuck until you can’t move any longer, _you are going to ride yourself on me until you drop_ , do you understand?”

Then Eren.

Looks at him.

And it’s fucking tight, it’s hot it’s unbearably hot and all at once and fuck he should have taken their clothes off all of them every single filthy scrap instead of this this this because Eren is fucking himself on him with the same energy and desperation he’d used to transform and it’s knocked the breath out of him or maybe Eren has sucked it all up- all the air in the universe for all he cares- with how heavy he’s panting now now now shit Levi didn’t even hear Eren’s yes sir and how he had wanted to hear that and he can see the sharp edges of Eren’s hip bones jutted through the edge of his shirt, flashes of bare skin as obvious as his erection and Levi latches onto Eren’s hips wondering if his grip will leave bruises and knows they will when Eren’s saliva drips across his cheek and Eren is apologising with his mouth- human speech near inaudible beneath his moans instead of kissing him with his soft lips and Levi isn’t sure what pisses him off more but that sure pisses him the fuck off a _lot_ -

So he draws his sweaty palms (gross) over Eren’s rib cage and to his back, to push him forward so Levi can lean close enough to bite at his neck wondering if he’ll leave marks there too and knowing full well he will when Eren pushes Levi in so deep his attempt to push himself back up is flawed and jittery, _stuck_. Levi can feel the shaking of Eren’s limbs from his sheer exhaustion, the loud groan this causes to come from Levi startles Eren to immobility- a rabbit before the wolf.

So Levi draws a hand back into Eren’s hair, touching it, combing, petting his fingers through it before he finds his grip from the very first time he’d come to grip Eren’s hair back in the courtroom- he bites at Eren’s ear before harshly asking on the crest of his own moan- “Why have you stopped?”

It takes some time before Eren can speak, as he tries to relocate his breath into speech.

“I’m sor- sorry e- excuse me sir I’m-”

Levi lets his gaze trail over Eren’s flushed face, down his still clothed chest to the lower half of him that is bare and attached to him. Levi sure as fuck is never going to make the mistake of not ordering Eren to strip fully before they fucked ever again. He’s staring, down down down to where they are connected and Eren has him in by the hilt. Damn.

Eren’s whole body is shaking and Levi can feel it, feel fucking all of it.

He soothingly runs a hand across the lower portion of Eren’s back, drawing it across his bruised hip. Stroking it. Caresses it.

“Are you not feeling well?”

Eren is hesitant to reply this time, biting at his lip. Levi’s gaze shoots up to watch this most engaging action and his gaze remains there on Eren’s face as Eren finally answers- “Not very well sir.”

“Is that so,” Levi says, his fingers trailing over Eren’s belly, beneath the shirt that’s all that Eren wears, a shirt that hangs over Eren’s slim frame- to fist Eren’s erection, his touch rough and far from that soothing caress of before. It is not anything but possessive as Levi still sees it, his order, desperate to be completed in Eren’s delirious gaze.

Levi’s voice is a leveled murmur, “Are you quite sure about that?”

His thumb crushes against the tip of Eren’s cock, the jerk of Eren's hips so promptly abrupt Levi's moan is almost equally loud as Eren’s. Eren, who having resumed the same frantic rhythm as before, his voice in rising volume crying out as he presses Levi in and out, out and in as Levi continues to touch him.

“Corporal! Corporal! Corporal-!”

(And it’ll come back and haunt Levi at the most inconvenient times, like when they’re goddamn riding through the woods and that stupid bitch female titan is trying to kill the lot of them and kidnap Eren or whatever it is the shit she really wants to do and Eren will call for him, almost like that- loudly-)

“ _Corporal!_ ”

And the thing about that is that unlike now, Eren won’t be close enough for Levi to pull him close to shut him up. Levi swallows every other _Corporal_ Eren has to pant, moan or scream as he feels the boy cum into his hand, terribly hot, but not as hot as how his whole body feels as it strives to fulfill its duty, for even after he’s cum Eren is still obeying Levi’s order, even more so. Though his body has sunk low, and Levi either mercifully or mercilessly is pulling him down against him, his hands fall back and grab at Eren’s ass, groping it as Eren struggles for breath, his hands sturdy upon Levi’s shoulders knowing they can be there, as he determinedly fucks himself on Levi, drawing himself back up, riding-

Eren looks down.

At him.

Down-

And Levi cums inside him. Hard.

Fuck.

He is going to have to clean that up.

As Eren collapses against him, surely blacked out, Levi thinks.

How difficult is it going to be to not fuck Eren in the bath?


End file.
